[MUSIC] So today we are going to talk about mindfulness and emotional intelligence. So this is how I define mindfulness and of course we are going to have more academic definition of mindfulness. What is the difference between these two pictures? The one on the right and left? So this guy is walking in the nature with his dog, right? And what is he doing? So he can be either mindful like his mind is food and that's how we usually walk, right? So I left Steinhaus to come to this building before the lecture. And during that literally during that four minute walk I was thinking about my schedule tomorrow. I was thinking about my meeting at 5.00. I was thinking about a deadline that I have that I need to complete before Friday morning. So that's what I was doing. Was I being mindful walking from one building to another? No, this was me. I was thinking about everything. But if I were mindful, how would you just walking, looking at the trees, enjoying the sunny day and saying that, I'm going to teach in life on a one. Everything is good, life is great, right? But that was definitely not me today. So this is how I am defining mindfulness and you're going to have more definition. So this is the definition. So mindfulness means focusing your awareness on the present moment, present moment. So what are you supposed to do right now if you are mindful? What are you supposed to be doing right now? If you are mindful you're paying attention to me and you're paying attention to this life, right? And being aware of your emotions and physical sensations in a nonjudgmental manner. And we're going to talk more about that. I would like to differentiate mindfulness and meditation. Because the first thing that comes to our minds when we hear the word mindfulness is what meditation. I am not going to define meditation in terms of various religious or spiritual practices or you name it. This is the definition of meditation based on dictionaries, Wikipedia and you name it. A practice there an individual uses a technique such as mindfulness or focusing the mind on a particular object thought or activity to train attention and awareness. So for the purpose of our session today we are going to talk about meditation and then I talk about meditation. This is really the type of meditation I'm talking about. It is bad to meditate. Absolutely not. I'm not trying to say that this is the best form of meditation. And we're going to talk about some of those other meditation practices. So we want to achieve a mentally clear and emotionally calm and stable state when we meditate. So these are the two definitions that I want all of us to be on the same page before we started. And this topic of mindfulness and meditation it has become really really popular. So this is an article that was published in 2017 in perspective on psychological sciences by a group of psychologists who decided to review all the literature and everything that is published in the media. In the scientific literature on meditation on the topic of mindfulness and meditation. Because why? Because there are some claims scientific claims or claiming that this is scientifically proven that meditation or mindfulness will result in ABC. Relaxation, less hypertension, less disease. So this group of psychologists published this paper Mind the hype. And they tabulated the data and the outcome of all these studies that were published from 1970 to 2015. So look at this graph. What is the first thing that jumps at you? So now be mindful and look at this graph. What jumps out at you on this graph? What is the first thing that jumps? Look what happens in about 2000. The number of papers, scientific papers and media reports is skyrocketing, skyrocketed in 2000 and it just kept going and going. Which means that from or maybe I should say in late 1990s we had an exponential increase in the number of scientific papers. And also media reports on the benefit of mindfulness and meditation. And we're going to talk about some of the positive effects that were actually sort of endorsed by these publications after they reviewed all these papers. Meditation sharpens your attention. That's something that they reported meditation improves stress, meditation improves mental health. But they also reported that there are more effective but not more effective than other matters. Meaning that if you have mental health, maybe therapy, maybe some of the, remedies that be discussing our stress class, maybe those are as effective to mindfulness, improve your relationships. So these are some of the positive benefits of meditation and mindfulness that they reported. So if you're a college students, which you are and you're looking at this slide, what is in it for you? Why do you think that your this is going to attract your attention? By improving your attention what is going to be the outcome? What is the ultimate outcome of improving your attention and improving your stress? What is the ultimate outcome? Okay, I have to share something to do. I have been teaching this class for six years. I have never had such a quiet class so I like to have participation. What jumps I do, yes. Okay so very good very good. So Andrew is saying that if you improve your attention it can eventually improve your stress, very true. But I want to even get simpler. You are students if you improve your attention what will happen? Yes, you do better in school. So if I were you and I'm sitting there I'm thinking wait a minute this is going to improve my GPA. So there is an incentive there for me and you're absolutely right. So this is what should jump at you. I was hoping that would jump at you but obviously I'm not doing a good job making sure that concept would jump at you. And these are a few mindfulness exercises because I think mindfulness is very, very important. And we are going to do an exercise as a group very soon, breathing. Focus on breathing with red cycles lasting for 6 seconds. And we are going to practice that right now. So what I want you to do is to see sit very comfortably wherever you are. And during the class on exercise we are going to talk about postures because this is how our posture is usually, or if you want to have a good posture, we're hyper extent. So have a very relaxed, normal sitting posture. And what I want you to do, you don't need to close your eyes. You're not going to listen to any music, you're just going to practice breeding because believe it or not, you don't breathe correctly. I don't we don't, [LAUGH] we have to make a conscious effort. So what I want you to do is to remember one word and that word is slow. The world is slow. So we are going to breathe in with all nose. And you're going to count to three like, 123. We're going to start now. We're going to hold that for maybe two seconds and then now we are going to breed out with your mouth. And if you're comfortable with your nose. And I want you to repeat that and you have to keep in mind that your breathing should last 6-7 seconds. 6-7 seconds and do it again. You hold it and then you breath out. This is one way to be mindful. And if we pay attention to our breeding for the most part we have, we breathe in a very very shallow way, right? How many of you breathe like this all day, raise your hands please. Okay, that's not good. So at least now you have a homework, you have a homework assignment observing. Why observing is important, why observing can be a mindful exercise, observe simple beautiful elements in the nature and your environment. And I'm going to go one step further and I'm going to say just observe, just pay attention to what's going on around you. That's another way for mindfulness. And this sounds really strange considering what has been what happened, the tragic helicopter accident this weekend. But one of the people that I always I have always talked to and the story that I have shared with my friends and family. When I wanted to talk about mindfulness, observing and also emotional intelligence is Mr Kobe Bryant. When my son was 7 years old. We very in a shopping center trying to pick up pizza from the pizza place. My son Kobe Bryant and he wasn't that far, he was walking into the pizza shop and he's pulling me and said mommy, mommy, look, look who is there. And sure enough, he was there holding two boxes of pizza and taking them to his car. And as he was walking to his car, he saw my son and he was like this, [LAUGH] he was like, infatuated, just standing there, not too far from him. And he looked at him and he continued walking, he put the pizza in his car and he walked back to him. He walked back to me say, hey, hello, how are you, what's your name? And I'm standing, I'm frozen, I'm like, my God, this is Kobe Bryant talking to, Is that real? I mean is this really happening? And then my 7 year old say yeah, all good. I really, really like the way you play. And they started having a conversation. I mean this is Kobe Bryant and this is my 7 year old son. So they started having this conversation and he said give me a five and they had a high five and that was it. And Kobe Bryant lives in Newport Beach at the time I used to live in that neighborhood and in that area. So we would, we would see him quite often and this is exactly how he was. And I used to tell my friends and my family, dad talking about observing and talking about being a good listener. Because my son talked to me for almost like five minutes. I'm like okay, that's that's good. And finally I said, you know what Mr brian has pizza in his car, he needs to go home to take the pizza home. And my son was just continue talking. He was not really listening, Kobe was listening and he was talking. So to me this is probably one of the most profound examples of observing and listening and really being in the moment. Because what he did that day, he made his day and from that point on, he became a big fan. A big, big fan saving all the money that he ever had allowance, working, doing chores or whatever to be able to buy a ticket and go see him, play at the staples center. So this was one of the moments that I really experienced the impact of mindful observation, listening, same story, living listening with no judgment. You just listen, you just listen with no judgment and you're just there to listen to whoever is talking to you. And one of the exercises for mine too, listening is also listening to music. So you play your music on your phone wherever you want on your laptop and you're just listening, you're being very mindful of that music. I don't know how many of you guys watch The Grammys. So who won so many albums, Billy Eilish, I didn't even know who she was, I'm sorry. But after Sunday I became a big fan and I have been listening to this album nonstop. I mean literally nonstop. I was working at home last night at 11 o'clock at night. I'm listening to bad guy and finally my husband said, this is the fifth time you've been. I say, yeah, I know because it's on the automatic, replay. And when I listen to these lyrics, I'm trying to just be in the moment and be mindful. And believe me, the music has had some impact and I'll be happy to share with you some of the I guess discoveries. That I've had just by listening to her lyrics and to her, amazing music appreciation, notice significant and significant things in your life. For instance, we are all here in this classroom right now. I'm talking you are listening. Is this a privilege to be in this classroom? Is this something to appreciate, how many kids your age? I shouldn't say kids, how many adults your age worldwide dream about sitting in that chair. And they don't have access to education or they don't have access to save education. Because if they leave their house from the house to their school, they may be shot, right? So this is a privilege. It's the other insignificant things that usually we are an appreciative of drinking water. How many students in this room do not have access to clean drinking water? So here we go. This is something else to be appreciative of. And there are many, many other mindful exercises that I can go on. But this is what I like to focus on today, and you're going to see them again during the practice. [MUSIC]
